Au! Appie. Nouri. Abdelhak Nouri. Last week it was announced that this young talented footballer will never be able to play football again… No one will have missed this news.
Why was I so touched by it? I don’t even know him personally. Why is he so popular at his young age of twenty? I went looking for answers.
Above all, he is a nice, affable young man, always friendly, loved by many. And an excellent and promising footballer.
“Unfortunately, we will never know how far his star would have reached if this hadn’t happened.” Edwin van der Sar said so beautifully last week. I have read a lot about him and seen a lot of him. My conclusion: he is a leader!
Appie is a Golden Leader
Naturally, Appie showed what leadership is, Golden Leadership. Without directly having hierarchical responsibility, he is a great personal leader. It’s no coincidence that we’ve seen so much tribute to and support for Appie and his family in recent weeks.
A true leader is a role model and creates followers
He already had many followers, and now even more are joining. People who see him as a role model. Not only as a footballer but above all as a human being. Why? What can we learn from Appie? What can we apply in our own lives and the lives of others?
I’ve put it on a list:
- Respect
- Dankbaarheid
- Oprechte aandacht
- Hoog bewustzijn (EQ)
- Nieuwsgierigheid
- Betrokkenheid
- Verbinder
- Accountability
- Trots
- Liefde geven
1. Respect
A leader has a basic attitude of respect. Respect for who someone is in essence. Respect for another’s worldview. This usually means they do not or at least less judge. This attitude makes leaders humble and curious.
Nouri showed respect for everyone, regardless of origin, faith, and ability. His respect also commanded respect for him.
2. Dankbaarheid
Grateful, always grateful was Appie. Grateful for his parents, grateful for his origin, grateful for Allah, grateful for his fans, grateful for Amsterdam, for his neighborhood. Being grateful and being able to show it is a great quality.
3. Oprechte aandacht
In conversations, he showed his sincere and full attention. Even if they were sometimes short moments, he gave his surroundings 100% attention. People felt heard by him. How many people genuinely pay attention to others?
4. Hoog bewustzijn (EQ)
A highly developed consciousness is an EQ quality (Emotional Intelligence). Appie was well aware of his strengths and weaknesses. He was well aware of his actions, his emotions, his attitude, and what he said, as well as the effect it had on others. Leaders ask themselves questions that keep them sharp and alert, and they regularly ask their surroundings for feedback.
5. Nieuwsgierigheid
Valued leaders are curious. Appie was that. Always curious how things could be better, who else he could learn from in his football career. He had role models around him. He respected them and learned a lot from them.
6. Betrokkenheid
It’s incredible how involved and able he was with many, alongside his top sports career. He was there for young street footballers, for whom he is a role model. He was there for his neighborhood (Geuzenveld in Amsterdam), he was there for his family, for mosque visitors. He seemed to be where he could make a difference for others.
Through his involvement, he allowed others to grow.
7. Verbinder
His natural connecting power permeates everything and is palpable. And seems to have become even stronger since he – incapacitated – is in the hospital. In this time of polarization, it’s so cool to see someone making connections: within the Moroccan community, within the neighborhood, within the football world (national and international).
8. Accountability
Accountability: you could count on him. ‘You do what you say and say what you do’, he did that. Appie was accountable to himself and to his surroundings. That made him reliable. He kept his promises within his team. His family, his neighbors could count on him.
Just as he remained true to his Moroccan origin and his faith. This also includes Ramadan: not eating or drinking until sunset and still playing matches and following heavy training sessions. And being accountable to prayer: at Ajax, he got an empty dressing room so he could pray in peace.
9. Trots
Being able and willing to be proud. That is not for everyone. Appie is proud of what he has achieved. And especially proud of what he means to others. Proud of his family, proud of his neighborhood, proud of his Ajax.
10. Liefde geven
Ultimately, isn’t it about love? Where ‘giving’ is an important aspect? If you give a lot from your heart – like Appie – you also get a lot back. Without explicitly asking for it. It’s a natural process. Just like in a relationship or in the workplace. The question ‘what does the other person need?’ is a basic question and a basic attitude. Appie wanted to give, from his heart. How many hearts did he not send to others with his hands? He literally said: “I want to make people enjoy”. He enjoyed himself and wanted to pass on the Great Enjoyment. He wanted to contribute. He constantly wondered how he could help young people out, so they could (re)take control.
I wish Appie Nouri and his family much strength and hope that many will follow his example and embody his leadership and humanity.
Want to read more? Check out my book “My Best Team Ever! In 7 Steps to Golden Leadership“.
